An Open Letter to the Guy Who Decided I Wasn't Good Enough for Him

  I'm still running through every conversation, every lingering glance, every accidental brush of our hands trying my best to figure out where everything went wrong because from my perspective everything seemed to be splendid. That was until, my last text to went without a response, worry settled into my bones because I thought that maybe something bad had happened and then the next day I saw a post from you, but there still was no reply to my message. I didn't push though, I just let you be and then my heart leaped when my phone buzzed across the table, your name the one that made the screen light up. The message was vague and went misunderstood on my part because a few days later, you left me on read and my stomach dropped because obviously something went wrong, on my part I took 20 seconds of insane courage and asked what I had done. No reply, simply a notification letting me know you had seen my message but never intended to respond.

It's been weeks and sometimes when it's nearing 3am and the gentle hum of the air conditioning unit has quieted. My mind wanders over every encounter we had, all the late nights and sleepy texts we shared in the forbidden hours of the morning, I begin to wonder whatever happened to make you decide I wasn't good enough for your love. I've had many almost relationships, but yours is the one that perplexes me the most because I saw your genuine interest in me and then one day it all faded, leaving me in a constant state of confusion for a few days.
I liked you and I believe we could have gone somewhere made something of ourselves together had you not abruptly decided that I was of no use to you.

I know I am not an easy person to like all the time, I can be difficult and foul-hearted at times, but if you had been willing to look past all of that and see me for who I am I feel as though you may have fallen in love with the girl behind the stubborn attitude.
Maybe though, that's what scared you because you knew that you could very easily fall in love with me and you weren't sure you could handle it. That's okay though because clearly you weren't worth my time, not with every mixed signal and unread message. For every time you ignored me, my mind screamed for me to leave you behind because I was better than anything you could offer. For every misinterpreted glance there was a brief point in which I could've cried, though I never did. I wasn't worth your time, which very clearly means you weren't worth my tears.

Clearly I wasn't good enough for you, but that's okay because I need only be good enough for myself. I am a hurricane, my mind is a confusing place and not everyone can handle that; not everyone is skilled enough to sift through every broken piece of my heart, to keep up with every wild thought and everything that draws my attention to anywhere but your face.
You are missing nothing aside from a girl who would love with her entire being and make sure that you were always happy and satisfied before she ever thought about herself. That's okay though because I do not need you, I do not need someone who cannot appreciate me nearly as much I will appreciate them. I'm okay with not being good enough because there is someone else I can be good enough for, you don't matter here. Maybe at some point you could have mattered, but you don't and I am grateful for that because clearly you weren't good for me.

I am not good enough for you because you were the wrong fit, but I am good enough for someone and I will forever relish in the fact that they have come sooner than I believed were possible.