23 Things You Should Know by Nineteen
23 Things You Should Know
By Nineteen
1. It's okay to be different.
I mean its 2017 being different shouldn't be looked upon as strange anymore. Everyone's different and you should never be afraid to hide that because you can't take back the time you lose pretending to be someone you aren't.
2. You should know how to do your taxes
I know that sounds terrifying because you could easily mess it all up, but they have ones that are set up with instructions throughout the entire thing and there are free tax services out there. If its still a terrifying thought have someone sit down with you and guide you along the way the first time, its actually quite simple once you actually understand what you're doing.
3. Your parents will be disappointed with you at times
They are your parents and they want the best for you even when it seems like they don't because they want exactly the opposite of what you want. We've all been there, in a time when our parents were disappointed in the choices we've made and the paths we've strayed onto; I promise you this, their disappointment does not mean they love you any less, it just means they're scared and trying to find it somewhere in their hearts to be happy for you despite not agreeing with your choice.
4. It's okay to change your major in college or not even know what your major will be
You still have your life ahead of you and these kinds of decisions take time, it's normal to change your major at least once before settling. I know I did and it was the best decision I've ever made and despite having spent a year working towards another major, I never did feel like I lost any valuable time just slightly delayed where I'm going to end up and in the end that year has benefited me in more ways than I believed possible. Don't rush your decision, just give yourself time and you'll find what your major is soon enough.
5. You don't have to go to college if it doesn't feel right to you
While yes the thought of jumping right into the world after high-school is a terrifying thought, so is college and you don't have to go if you feel like it won't suite you. Take that time and find yourself, travel the world, meet new people, try new food, and find the beauty in the mundane because maybe it will free your soul for a time and you'll realize that college doesn't seem so bad or it may open your eyes to a whole new way of living and you'll spend your life travelling around working odd jobs and exploring the universe. No matter what happens, remember that this is your life and in the end you have the final say in whether you choose college or choose to love yourself instead.
6. You're mental illness doesn't define you and it certainly is not beautiful
Just because your mind isn't well does not make you any less of a person than if your mind were at peace with your soul, but it is not beautiful. Your mental illness mirrors a physical illness in a sense and we don't see anybody glorifying cancer, no they glorify the person who survived cancer. DO NOT let people glorify your depression or anxiety, shut them down when they do. Let them glorify you for battling those demons and coming out with them instead of staying locked in your bedroom shrouded in darkness. Celebrate your good days and fight through the bad days, but certainly don't let them rule your life and most definitely don't let anybody praise the illness that you're battling.
7. It's okay to tell your childhood friends goodbye
I know it's hard and they're definitely not the sort of people we want to let go of, but if they are hindering you and holding you back from your full potential its time to say goodbye. You need friends who will help you thrive and push you to try new things and work for better opportunities, not friends who will shield you and keep you close to them because they're afraid you'll find better friends than them.
8. Change your hair as much as you'd like until you find what suites you
I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've changed my hair because it's been a lot. I've had extremely short hair with bangs and long hair with bangs and everything in between. I have gotten strange looks when I've sported some wild colors and some snobby comments whenever someone didn't like the new hairstyle I was sporting, but I never let that stop me from expressing myself. Don't let what other people will think keep you from changing your hair, dye it blue or dye it black, cut it short or keep it long, but whatever you do always make sure that its exactly what you want and not what anyone else is expecting you to do.
9. It's okay to love yourself
I know that so many people look down upon anybody showing themselves even a sliver of self-love and I say screw that because there is nothing wrong with loving yourself. There is nothing wrong with loving the body you were given and enjoying the way your fat jiggles when you dance in your underwear. Screw what everyone else says and love yourself just the way you are because there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
10. Sometimes you have to run away for a while
I know that sounds crazy, but hear me out. There is no wrong in running away to clear your head and to be able to breathe again, there is something reviving in escaping the city limits you've spent years wondering and driving with music playing softly in the background while the wind blows through the open car windows. That breath of fresh air on the open road and stopping in a town where nobody knows your name or your past, it gives you new life because in a place where nobody knows you, you can become anybody. So run away every now and again, let your lungs fill with fresh air while your head clears of all the fog and realize how much more productive you become.
11. Music doesn't age the way that people do, it ages more like fine wine
We've all had that moment in which we've been listening to a song and someone comments on how old the song is and suddenly we become self conscious of every song choice we've ever made. Here's the thing though, music doesn't age like you and I do, no music ages more like fine wine. The longer it sits untouched the more beautiful and tasteful it will be whenever we finally blare it through the speakers and you can tell anyone this the next time they judge your choice in music.
12. Donate any of your unused things to charity
You know exactly what I'm talking about, like those semi-new rain-boots that turned out to be extremely uncomfortable despite how cute they were and that old sweatshirt your middle school boyfriend gave you that you "forgot" to give back. We all have things that we're holding onto for sentimental value or things we bought and wore or used once or twice and now it just sits taking up very much needed space and possibly collecting dust. Pack it up, do a bit of spring cleaning and appreciate the memories you have tied to it, but give it up so that someone else can make memories with it and sometimes wonder what made it so special to the last person who owned it.
13. Plan a big night in with your friends as much as possible
Make it a weekly thing if possible, have a special night set aside where you get together at each others house and you eat tons of junk food, watch cheesy romances or thrilling horrors, sit around in a circle playing apples to apples drinking soda from the liter and laughing at the old stories being shared, pass out in the living room with a Disney movie playing in the background, put on some dance tunes and dance around the living room. I promise you these nights won't go unappreciated because it's a way for all of you to just let go and not worry about the stress of everyday and how terrifying it is to be a young adult. Take lots of pictures on those night and make sure that everyone gets every single picture because someday you'll want those to reminisce over.
14. Read as many books as you can
I know this sounds boring especially to those of you who don't read, but reading opens your eyes up to a whole new world and expands your mind. You start to see things in a different way and you begin to notice the little things in life, so yes read as many books as you can and never, I mean never apologize for getting immersed in a good book and losing track of time.
15. Try out something new
Sign up for a yoga class and stick with it till the end. Take an art class even if you're really a bad artist. Listen to a different genre of music for an entire week. Buy your groceries at a different store than your usual spot. Sign up for cooking lessons and get the full use of all your money from it. Volunteer at your local homeless shelter and watch the faces of those seeking help light up at such a simple gesture. Treat your weekly lunch date the next time around just to mix things up. Try using a different brand of detergent than your normal kind and see if you can tell the difference. Create a playlist of songs that remind you of every single one of your friends. Surprise your family with a random visit and watch your mother's eyes fill with tears of joy at the sight of her baby. Jump out of your comfort zone and try something you would've never dreamed of doing before.
16. Never be afraid to tell someone if your in a bad relationship
I know its scary and you don't want people to know that you aren't capable of handling awful things by yourself, but this is the last thing you need to be dealing with alone. Especially if the person your in a relationship is abusive because darling you are so valuable and worthwhile and no one, I mean no one deserves to be in a relationship where they are not valued and treated properly.
17. It's okay if you still live at home
Owning an apartment is expensive and its not always something you can get right when you turn eighteen. There's not just the expense of rent, there's the expense of food, cleaning supplies, dishes, furniture to furnish your place and so many other things that it would take forever to list. Take advantage of your parent(s) or guardian(s) kindness and the roof over your head because believe me, its worth a lot more than you can even fathom at this point.
18. You don't have to go out with your friends every single time they invite you
We all get it, adulting is pretty freaking expensive and your friends understand that so they should be pretty understanding when you tell them you can't because your broke. It happens and you're nineteen and no doubt working in some measly minimum wage job. We've all been there, I mean the paycheck sucks but the hours are great and the people you work with are even better so you stick with it cause you don't know many other places that will work with you as well as that job does.
19. You don't have to look like you just walked off the runway in Paris to stay in trend
Seriously though, have you been out in public lately, the style most days has a more of just rolled out of bed trend than just strolled off the Paris runway. You could literally stroll over to the local Wally World buy a few pairs of track shorts and couple over sized t-shirts, toss on your brothers ball cap and wear a pair of slides and you are on trend, easy peezy.
20. You can suffer from an eating disorder even if you are considered overweight by society
Eating disorders are not something to joke about and it is possible for "overweight" people to suffer from them. You can be anorexic and still be considered fat, when your body isn't getting the right amount of food and nutrients coming through it will start to find ways to get those needed nutrients and it will start to break down muscle mass before it ever reaches the fat. This can cause you to become very sick, eating disorders are not a joke. Bulimia is also something that someone who is "overweight" can suffer from and your body will get to the point where you can't keep anything down even when you want too, even when you need too.
If you or anyone that you know is suffering with an eating disorder please talk to someone and get help, eating disorders are serious matters and they can kill you.
The National Eating Disorders hot line for the U.S is 1-800-931-2237, they are available from 9am-9pm Monday-Thursday and 9am-5pm on Friday.
21. Just because your friends are settling in and getting engaged and having kids left and right, doesn't mean that you have to follow suite
First of all, your nineteen and you are just starting out in the world, you're practically a baby in society and no doubt still living at home. What's the rush in getting married and having kids? There's nothing wrong with waiting to get married, waiting until you've had time to graduate college and get settled into a good job. I know there's big appeal in having someone to share the bed with every night and wake up to cook breakfast in the mornings, but there's also a beautiful appeal in starting out at a job, a job that you actually love and there's appeal in finally being able to get a place of your own and taking the time to get to know yourself again while you work to be able to live comfortably or fabulously.
22. Change up your routine every so often
If you normally roll out of bed with ten minutes to get ready otherwise you'll be late, try getting up early to do up your hair and makeup and wear a cute outfit. If your the one who gets up two hours before you need to just make sure you look pristine, try sleeping in some and throwing on some mascara and a little gloss with a simple outfit. Change up your routine every so often and see how even the smallest changes can make such a difference in your daily life.
23. It's never to early to start preparing for Christmas
So what if it's May, if you see something that you know one of your friends or family members would absolutely love and you don't think it will be there later in the year, go ahead and get it for them. Take this from the person who is awful at time management and is running around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to find presents for everyone. It's never to early to start buying Christmas presents because you're less likely to go insane when it actually rolls around.
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